Blue Moon Winter Abbey Ale 5.6% ABV

My first sip of Coors Winter; my immediate impression is that this is not the worst beer in the world.  The expected sweetness not overwhelming, I let it sit and tended to my Shake 'N Bake and assorted reheats.

A casual second sip some number of minutes later, and the finish was of particular note.  This finishes like a cheap beer, I thought to myself.  A peculiar, but familiar taste of alcohol.  The monks of the Rockies must have been a little impatient cooking this one up.  But who wouldn't in similar frustratingly pious circumstance.  Pious being complimentary of course;  props of some sort must be due the chaste.  It's only right.

Third encounter and beyond, and as expected, the uncivilized finish has disappeared and things are mellowing out considerably as I almost certainly have consumed this too fast.  I consider this mission accomplished, not so much in the 2003 on an aircraft carrier sense, but in the not overthinking a beer sense.  It is precisely a winter ale, sharing the common characteristics, not that it's particularly my favorite species of beer but it delivers on it's name in a manner of economy that can be universally appreciated.

Hmm.  That finish really comes and goes.  It's there, or it isn't.  Very strange.  Anyway, I'm hungry.  And some indiscernible fraction in the bag.

Cape Ann Brewing Company Fisherman's Pumpkin Stout 7.0% ABV

Discovered on offer at the Great Brewers Grand Prix of Gloucester, the annual North Shore cyclocross tradition, Cape Ann's foray into autumn medicine is a delight.  Subtly flavored, peculiarly headless, and lacking the punch and sweetness its ABV may insinuate, pumpkin stout has a place in the fridge from hereon in.  Find it wherever beer is sold in Massachusetts, before they tax it into oblivion to subsidize some highway project gone awry.

Bells Two Hearted Ale

What's not to like about a beer with a trout on the label?

Continuing my tour of Northern Michigan beers, I bought Bell's Two Hearted Ale. This is a fairly rich, IPA style ale. A nice floral hoppy aroma without being a hop bomb which is so common in IPA's lately. I really liked this as a result. i am all for full hop flavor, but am not a fan of feeling like I have just eaten some shrubbery. Two Hearted Ale is really well balanced and crisp which made it go down quite easily on a hot evening.

So so far, Bell's brewery is two for two.

Oberon Ale

Picture a warm summer day in the far north of Michigan. Surrounded by family, young and old...

Need an anesthetic? Obviously. Well Bell's Brewery's Oberon is the beer for you. A malty lightly hopped ale with enough punch to keep you from noticing the chaos.

[Censored] Imperial Blonde

My apologies to Manchester Brewing Company.  I promised them that we'd do a review of their beers a long time ago, but we're just getting around to it now, nearly a year later.

When I cracked this bomb open I was greeted by a rush of lagery aroma.  First sip was crisp and reinforced the lager character, which confused me, because I was sure that this was an ale.  Visiting MBC's site, I discovered the reason, Saaz hops.  These are typically used in lagers such as Pilsner Urquell and I think Budweiser.  This is something I've always wanted to try in homebrewing, an ale with lagerry characteristics.   The idea is to marry the heft of an ale with the crisp thirst quenching lightness of a Czech or domestic lager.  If this was their goal, MBC has succeeded.  The sweetness and bitterness is also well balanced and makes it easy to chug.  This is the perfect choice following a few rounds of golf or a summer afternoon of yard work.  Be sure to decant into an appropriate glass first unless you don't mind the sediment; indication of an unfiltered and therefore more flavorful beer.  Personally, I've paired this beer up with a good stogie and a seat on the deck watching the lightning bugs get down.  Good job guys, I'm glad the first review was a positive one.  If Imperial Blonde is any indication of what to expect with their other offerings, MBC has a bright future in the New England beer scene.

Honey Moon Summer Ale 5.6% ABV

I'm with AK on Blue Moon. Blue Moon proper is a staple. Solid performer, consistent, good balance, generally cheap - it's a go-to beverage you don't need to think too hard about.

But the Blue Moon summer bastard offspring, hereby known as Honey Moon. SIGH. I'm in OMR's camp on this. Just stop. Stop overdoing shit.

Subtlety is long lost on whoever concocted this syrupy sweet libation. As it is on many things these days. Honey Moon cuffs you about the palate with an overreaching and unnecessary sweetness, wholly betraying its heritage. It's not intolerable dumpster runoff like, well, Peak Maple Oat, but it's definitely in the same area code.

Don't reach for this one. Stay the course. If you're driving down Blue Moon Boulevard, do not take this right hand turn into Flavortown. At this point I will stop writing because I have now cracked the lid on any number of Guy Fieri references.

Gritty's Scottish Ale - 6.3% ABV

Ah Gritty's. I haven't had a Gritty's that I didn't like. Their beers have a distinctively British bent to them and as a hopeless Anglophile, that appeals to me. They don't get too fancy or burn you out with cloying sweetness or overpowering hops. I hate the cliche, but it's good honest beer.

Scottish ales tend to be sweeter, heavier and darker than their southern counterparts. I think this is a reaction to the rough terrain and harsher climes at that latitude. After a day of kilting it up in the highlands, tossing cabers in the moors and smoking peat, you'd want a strong sweet beer and the nearest fireplace too. Granted, this is just what I imagine life in Scotland is like, I've only spent a couple of days in Edinburgh, so I'm hardly an expert. Gritty's Scottish Ale is an "interpretation" of the style, which means that one or more of the characteristics on which beer is judged falls outside the boundaries set by the style. Who cares? The label is pretty inspiring though, I have to say. Who knew that Scottish women were so butch...and had beards. I will say though that this is a good comfort beer. On the lower end of the spectrum in alcohol content typical of this style, you can easily work this into your session rotation without getting thoroughly cranked, unless that's your goal. Delicious and refreshing, I give this beer 8 lifted kilts.
-qrash

Peak Organic Maple Oat Ale 5.2%

Enough with you, Peak. I've had enough of your shit. You screwed me once with your insolent Pomegranate Ale. And for whatever reason, I went back to the well, throwing in a different bucket and expecting a different result.

I am hopelessly stupid to have given you another chance. Maple Oat has one or two good sips in it; the first ones. After that, this beer summons the forces of awfulness to bring forth, slowly, what will become an intolerable sweetness in half a pint's time. By the end of the glass, I am literally making bitter beer face-like contortions that a passerby would mistake for pepper spray-induced asphyxiation, evocative of the erratic, involuntary mimetic muscular response observed when a newborn is slipped a thimble of Genesee to chase the evening nutrition. Screw you Peak.

Victory Brewing Company Golden Monkey 9.5% ABV

This beer is an intolerable tornado of flavor.

Also it gives you bad dreams.

End of review.

-cp

Redhook Saturnalia Double Red (2008) 8.0% ABV

It had been quite a spell since my last trip to Redhook. Oh the days of abbreviating a work day, planting one's ass in a booth and quaffing half a half dozen IPAs. Just enough to make things vibrate on the walk to the bathroom and forget the day's tedium. The tedium of the days of a storied time. A time when a man could drive a golf ball with a putter inside an office without regard for his coworker's safety. A time when a man could destroy window blinds with a thrown banana and blame it on the confluence of an open window and a pigeon. What a time that was.

How I longed for a taste of that wonderful IPA once more on Sunday, which brought us belly up to the great gilded copper beer holdy thing, and squarely into the radar of two patrons simmering with lust for Saturnalia. Having personally never heard of it, these folks insisted I try some, having assessed my hop expectation requirement/percentage enjoyment (HERPE) to be higher than average. Well, toddler size portion in-hand, I savored and sampled this allegedly sought after libation. At a minimum it couldn't suck that bad because little plastic hops adorned the tap handle.

At first, good! Hoppitty hop hop here we go. And not the rugged finish I expected; very abrupt finish compared to other heavily hopped creations I've had. But this icky awful sweetness. BLECK. This lingering sweetness ruined it for me. As soon as the Saturnalia junkies left the establishment, I put out a code red on a Long Hammer and barely had the self control to snap this picture before literally eating it with a carnal lust known only to serial killers and Cheeto junkies.